Okay, Johno and I have already worked this out, but to anyone else who feels involved, I'm putting everything down in clear writing so there won't be any miscommunications.
1. It was not a "There is so much drama, we don't want to be involved in that." at all. I understand that not everything I was saying may have made it to the other end of the table. What I was trying to convey was: 'I want to do this concert. At this moment, *I'm* not really comfortable with our current state of repertoire. Just from friends' experiences, I'm worried about becoming involved in any drama that might occur because of us not really performing filk at a filk con. *I* just want to make sure we have some filk material before we perform.' This was me being concerned about not being received well. I didn't intend for any attitude, just worried about preparations.
It's hard to get new songs down when we live an hour apart.
2. "K" and I are both extremely grateful for Johno's help and faith. Our first opportunity to perform was a failure of communication. We were scheduled for a Sunday, and K had church.
3. This is just to kinda clear my name. Young? Yes, definitely. Inexperienced? No, not particularly. I've played numerous gigs and recitals, which is one of the reasons I'm such a stickler for being prepared and responsible. 'Off the cuff semi-put-off excuse for things' is nothing of the sort. Any reluctance to perform is explained by the next half: "put on the spot". As I said, I'm a stickler for being completely prepared. This means warming up, knowing my material, and knowing the format of the performance. Being asked to sing a solo 'on the spot' I had not sung in a VERY long time, and without any of the previously mentioned things (warmup -cough-), does alarm me a bit. There is no reluctant "act" around performing. When I feel unprepared I am not in my comfort zone and believe me, I am truly reluctant.
As K (and anyone else who talked with me about the topic) knows, I love filk, and I'd love the opportunity to perform at a concert. She tells me she feels the same way. I sincerely respect how honorably hurt feelings were brought to light and hope that none of my future actions will warrant such strong discussion.
I know all of you to be amazingly generous and level-headed friends. Now that this issue is clarified, I hope we can move forward in our quest to listen to some great music. And I'd just like to thank Johno and Chris one more time for talking with me. Thank you so much!
Thank you for helping me understand it better. I really do care about you, and admire your talent and your attitude about doing things well.
Let's just say that in an unstructured filk room or at a bash, the environment is relaxed and most of the people, as you well know, are not professionals. So I would encourage you to relax a bit about preparation worries in those formats, if you can. *hugs*
For a concert, yes you want to be prepared, and I don't think anyone would suggest not. I'm going to do what I can to support you both in getting the practice time you'll need - school will be out; I know you'll have ymp. We can make that work, I'm pretty sure. The lotr material fits the theme, you and Kat will need to talk about other songs.
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-raises hand-
Date: 2007-06-06 04:42 am (UTC)1. It was not a "There is so much drama, we don't want to be involved in that." at all. I understand that not everything I was saying may have made it to the other end of the table. What I was trying to convey was: 'I want to do this concert. At this moment, *I'm* not really comfortable with our current state of repertoire. Just from friends' experiences, I'm worried about becoming involved in any drama that might occur because of us not really performing filk at a filk con. *I* just want to make sure we have some filk material before we perform.' This was me being concerned about not being received well. I didn't intend for any attitude, just worried about preparations.
It's hard to get new songs down when we live an hour apart.
2. "K" and I are both extremely grateful for Johno's help and faith. Our first opportunity to perform was a failure of communication. We were scheduled for a Sunday, and K had church.
3. This is just to kinda clear my name. Young? Yes, definitely. Inexperienced? No, not particularly. I've played numerous gigs and recitals, which is one of the reasons I'm such a stickler for being prepared and responsible. 'Off the cuff semi-put-off excuse for things' is nothing of the sort. Any reluctance to perform is explained by the next half: "put on the spot". As I said, I'm a stickler for being completely prepared. This means warming up, knowing my material, and knowing the format of the performance. Being asked to sing a solo 'on the spot' I had not sung in a VERY long time, and without any of the previously mentioned things (warmup -cough-), does alarm me a bit. There is no reluctant "act" around performing. When I feel unprepared I am not in my comfort zone and believe me, I am truly reluctant.
As K (and anyone else who talked with me about the topic) knows, I love filk, and I'd love the opportunity to perform at a concert. She tells me she feels the same way. I sincerely respect how honorably hurt feelings were brought to light and hope that none of my future actions will warrant such strong discussion.
I know all of you to be amazingly generous and level-headed friends. Now that this issue is clarified, I hope we can move forward in our quest to listen to some great music. And I'd just like to thank Johno and Chris one more time for talking with me. Thank you so much!
Re: -raises hand-
Date: 2007-06-07 12:26 am (UTC)Let's just say that in an unstructured filk room or at a bash, the environment is relaxed and most of the people, as you well know, are not professionals. So I would encourage you to relax a bit about preparation worries in those formats, if you can. *hugs*
For a concert, yes you want to be prepared, and I don't think anyone would suggest not. I'm going to do what I can to support you both in getting the practice time you'll need - school will be out; I know you'll have ymp. We can make that work, I'm pretty sure. The lotr material fits the theme, you and Kat will need to talk about other songs.